Stories of friends….

The Shower

A friend of mine, and I would like to point out here clearly, this is a story which happen to a friend of mine and not me. I have not been involved in this at all personally, also not in similar kind of situation.

My friend was invited as best man to the wedding of a friend of mine in the Unites States, so he was hanging around with two of the Bride Maids in a Hotel Room, then they ask me, him: “Would you like to have a shower together?”

My friend agreed without hesitation, cause these two American girls been really hot. So, he went to the shower room, prepared everything for a smooth processing of the shower act for three people. He removed his clothes put a Towel around his waist and turned on the water. Then the water temperature reached the perfect temperature he went with his towel around his waist back to the Ladies and said happily:” The Water temperature is perfect, let’s go!”

The two ladies looked quite stunned at him. He asked them with a puzzled look in his face: “I thought we wanted to have a shower together?”

The two Bride Maids start laughing at him and said: “We asked you if you want to have a shot together, what did you hear?”

Quite embarrassing for my friend. Which shows again, if it comes to men and women the standards and expectations are far different and lead to misunderstandings, based on wishful thinking and boring reality.

Salmon on the Table

Long time ago we have been invited to a birthday party of a girl, and it was great. It happens to me that the birthday girl had a crush on my friend and so she used the camouflage and distraction of the party environment to sneak away with him. The other  of us didn’t really notice their absence, till a door open and our not really missing friend came out and some female voice was headed out of the room with the words: ”Why don’t you stay a bit more and cuddle a bit!” Which our friend loudly responded with: “But I have to tell the guys what gorgeous stuff we did.” He turned closed the door and came to us with a bright satisfied smile to us. Something seemed to hit the door heavily, like a pillow thrown with anger from inside the room, but cannot been said for sure. Our friend to us in the kitchen of the birthday Girls house and 8 more party guests, what he has been doing while we enjoyed the public party and told us about his private party arrangements with the Birthday Girl. We been skeptical and wanted some proof of him, so we asked him to put his salmon on the table.

The whole Party Crowd was shouting: “Salmon on the table! Salmon on the table!” Our friend started slowly to prepare a tissue on the edge of the kitchen table, while the crowd cheered more and grow bigger. Then with a confident smile he opened his pant and put his salmon on the prepared tissue as evidence for his story. We all cheered, and we started under the ACDC Song, she shook me all night long, to play the game kill the table. The Game goes like that: You dance with many people as possible till the table gives up and is dead.

You asking for the Birthday Girl? We have not seen her the rest of the party, and for some reason none of us ever have been invited since by her. I personally believe it was cause of the Kitchen table. Anyway, was still a memorable time of our student time.

Best German Invention

I believe most of the world will agree that many inventions have been made in Germany or by Germans. But there is one Invention, which might not got praised enough, since we will only realize the full benefit of this German creation at a point in life there some are close to have a mental breakdown or become alcoholics.

This invention made in 1779 by Johann Friedrich Oberlin and Louise Scheppler and founded in Strasbourg changed the life positively of billons of people around the world till our present time. Even the original German name became international used and known till today.

The Kindergarten. Only Parents realize its full value. And every parent reading this will just heavily agree to this statement.  For all others, it is needed to explain a bit why this is so.

Then two Youngster decide, it’s so great to be with each other, they not only think to maybe just have sexual intercourse continuously and enjoy their life, no they think to get married, with a great celebration and having a baby or two or, god yes they are existing, even more babies.

The reason for that is simple, these two humans are too young to know and under the influence of pheromones and hormones, which blinding them to check before moving. Plus babies sleeping in the cart, trying to eat with all excrement’s of them looks so cute. Even a few times babysitting cannot get you the deeper understanding what  is really happening if you are 24 Hours alone with this little Human of you and your loved ones genetically mix.

Your sunny love relationship is for sure over, if the first offspring of yours is out of the female body. Yes, all are happy that pregnancy is over and the difficulties are done, and the man thinks he can have sexual intercourse soon again, which might be like that, but, the difficulties have just started and all before you faced in life was nothing compare to that.

But they are so cute and look like Angels then they are sleeping. Did you ever think about why everyone is saying that about babies and children? Because, it’s quite. They don’t ask for anything while they are sleeping. Mommy and Daddy can go have a shower, eat and drink, sit peacefully or even sleep. Because to sleep, rest or having your own time is what is the most valuable thing for a young mummy or daddy will be. If the baby sleeps for a few hours through especially at night then everyone else sleeps, its perfect be happy and grateful. But if not, you will be happy for some rest.

Now imagine that like in traditional way the daddy works and the mommy is alone at home with this demanding little human who wants all her attention. Now the Daddy comes from work, and cannot understand, based on his not being present, why it is so difficult and why his Wife has no mood for anything what before they both enjoyed together so much and much more often.

This can continue with some changes in demand and progresses for sure for 2-3 years. No personal life till Kindergarten.

Please don’t get me wrong, Kindergarten is mainly for the children, but it is good for both sides, since in our modern world the stress level is already so high up, that the Kindergarten in many surveys is one of the most supportive and beneficial institutions for parents. It releases the parents from their duty for some hours a day and make them capable to continue in a nice manner their parenthood. Good for children and their parent’s development.

In some states and cities in Germany the Kindergarten is even free of charge or sponsored, so that everyone can get his children into the Kindergarten.

Thank You Germany. The Parents around the world say thank you.

Crème on the skin

Not too long ago, there was a crème, a crème for all. It was a big pot standing in the bathroom and everyone dipped his fingertip or hand in it to take a share of this thick fatty white crème.

But things have changed. The generous sharing of crème has vanished based on more individualism in crème usage. The Reason is not based on hygienically reason as you would might expect. The Reason is that the crème producers realized that we all are different, and we all been shocked by these findings ourselves and got for each of us our personal crème pot.

In the start the Producers of crème concentrated on female humans, baby’s and kids, since they are so sensitive and full of wrinkles. The special crème moisturize their skin and makes it smooth as silk. That’s a good thing, who like to touch a female which feels like touching or moving over sandpaper. Another good thing was that the basic of all this crème was the old basic white fatty crème. Good for the producer, since he just could add something which made it different…

But before you can touch a female human, you need to look at one, preferably in the face, and if this is not good enough to look at, you try to find other points which are more attractive, if still this is not getting to a sufficient result, the crème producer found a reason for it. Crème for every single part of the female anatomy. And I mean really for all parts, not even the face is just the face, since according the crème producer anatomy, the eyelids and lips are to be seen separate from the face and need their own special crème. Therefor it’s necessary to mark and structure the body in borders, till where which crème should be used to avoid wrong effects.

But before putting each crème in the intended area, each region need to be prepared for the crème. Simple washing or rinsing with water is not good enough. A special wash-gel or serum, cleanser and others are needed before you can put the crème on the spots. Only than the promised effects can be achieved.

This procedure need to be repeated based on the time of the day minimum 2-3 times, since our skin needs different crème and treatment in the morning and overnight. Except you have a shower, than you can crème yourself already while having a shower, great, finally winning some time back.

This means that thanks to the crème producers educating us regarding treating our skin properly, females spend longer than ever in the bathroom, to avoid the plastic surgeon or reality…

But the worse is still coming women and first of all the crème producing industry demand now also based on the findings that men are even more different, to have special crème for men.  This also is to prevent men to steal crème from their mother, girlfriend or wife crème, which they most of the time would use for their hand regardless how big the pot is and if it’s for a total different area meant to be.

Men need special skin care: for the real man, the really rough man and the ultimate man as an example. Anyway which man would buy a pink crème pot with butterflies and flowers on it? The printed letters “For Men” makes the difference to buy crème. Men do not read the ingredients like women on the crème pot. With other words, if the crème producers are a bit naughty, they could just put the same basic crème in the “for men pot” and no man would realize. If that would work also for females?

The basic for sure is the same, as it is for medical crème as well.

Yes it is proven, that basic crème with herbs can help in case of dry skin as an example, but does it make the skin younger, removes wrinkles, would be a little medical miracle.

But with the crème it’s like with placebo, believe it helps and it will.

The Marketing of the crème producing industry help us to fulfill the bathroom with different kind of products for all areas of the body. You have to admit that they have been successful and if one Celebrity brings out his or her own crème, it will be sold out for sure in all stores, because even Teenager start to be concerned about their skin, even if their renewal based on their young cells should be the least to worry.

Crème has also inter human relation benefits, because creaming the partner brings you closer and can help the demographic situation in your country.

Crème is part of our modern social society.

Bra’s and Hair Saloons

Not everything is how it seems. This sentence must have come from a man who opens a bra for the first time. Bras have changed since their invention a lot, they have been in Spike Form and later they became more round and also unpredictable. Women can hide so much behind them and change their appearance towards the men. All men know this, you meet a wonderful beautiful lady and all goes smooth and the first time you have the permission to open the bra, you face following issues:
You cannot open it at the back and you do not have the Index-thumb Technic skill. Reason could be that either you are not experienced enough, to nervous or excited, careful with this one, or it’s a sports bra or worst case a front opener which makes men look like idiots trying to open it with two hands, while she is watching you focusing desperately to open it.
If you could manage it you wonder what happened, where is the rest? It looked like more behind it. Welcome to the world of Wonder bra, always a surprise. The Problem is you cannot sue the Bra Company for wrongly advertising as well not the lady who wearing it or asking for an exchange.
So you have two choices at that moment, bear with it and continue, or leave and look for a new surprise with new effort which maybe leads to the same Result or Worse. Most men are quite convenient friendly and stay with what they have.
But why are men so after what is hidden in or behind the Bra of a woman? Actually it is for Baby’s, but I agree men and babies both love to play with them. From Biological perspective women do not need these big Breasts, especially if they have no fresh offspring to take care of. That is also the reason, why if a woman wants to lose weight the body will lose first at parts where a fat reserve is not necessary, so the breasts loose first, funny part is that women don’t want to lose the volume at that point as well. But I am sorry Ladies that is nature.
But why do human female wear a bra, just for creating illusions for the men? Since we started to walk on two legs big breast caused back pain for women, so they started to put them in clothing to support and throw the time and cultures we have different position holding systems for the female breasts. Since around hundred years the bra is existing and gave the more efficient and comfortable support for the women to release them from Back pain. Actually science till now is arguing why some women have big breasts and some have smaller. It is for sure that the size of the female breast got nothing to do with the capability of a women to feed the offspring. But why the breasts of a women are nicely rounded got a reason. Since we humans have a more flat face, the breasts need to be more rounded up to avoid that the baby will not suffocate while drinking. Big breasts of women show that these women produce more estrogen, but that also means that these women produce lesser testosterone which would stimulate to more sexual activity. Maybe that’s why smaller breast are more in favor for some men.
The reason why men are so attracted of the female breasts is evolution. We all know that our Ancestors are Apes and that Apes attract with their butt. Some even in a very shining red colour. Now you might say that we are also attracted to the Butt of the other Gender, men and women equally, but why breasts as well is the butt not enough, anyway the main reproduction process happens down in that Area. Because we humans started to walk up straight on two legs, so all of a sudden the butt of the other Gender was not anymore in our face while we walking on four excrements behind each other. So Nature had to come up with something new to attract which is easier to access for the eyes of a man. So Nature decided to grow the female breasts and in case a man would not see them nature kept the butt as secondary attraction point.
Thanks to nature there is much more variety, but why in versus versa nature did not give men a similar second attraction point for the women is maybe only explainable that at that time there was no equal rights for women yet established.
But after a man has accomplished to find the right partner he is happy with, new dangers are in the air who can give him unexpected surprises. If the Girlfriend, Wife or Lifetime partner of a man says that she will go to the Hair salon and will only trim the hair a bit, the man is in fear. Because Hair Stylist or Hair Designer how some of them call themselves today, misunderstand that creativity and good looking do not have to be two different things They use their influence and the lack of self- confidence of their Victim to try out new “Styles” which are the latest fashion in Places they have never been. While a man changes his Hair Style only if nature forces him to do so, women do that every time they feel like, without any need. If the woman comes back with her new Hair Style the man hardly can recognize his former Partner and in worst cases, does not even open the Door for this Stranger or opens it and says: ’Sorry, but my Girlfriend or Wife can come back anytime, just leave your number and I call you!” If you are clever you can act as it was meant as a joke, but to get around that you think she does not look like her anymore, is even more difficult and you have to give a lot of foot massages to make up for that again.
In other cases, fifty percent of men do not even realize that their lady changed anything or has been to the Hair salon, which makes the women annoyed since she spend hours and hundreds of Dollars to look like that, just for him and in rare cases also for herself. Same applies for Nails and facials or other pseudo cosmetic treatments.
An Advise to the women here; if you plan to do an radical change of your Hairstyle or other body parts, please consult first your boyfriend, Husband or Lifetime partner before taking any action, this would prevent embarrassing situations for both sides, and gives the man time to prepare mentally for what is coming. Anyway no harm for you, since most of men will give in or tell you just do what you want, its fine for me, as longest they don’t have to pay the Bill for it and can continue drinking their beer and watch TV. I am aware that women might say that it’s their body and they can do what they want with it and how they feel like, but women on the other hand like to comment the style, dress and appearance or their man, so it’s just equally fair that in a relationship mayor changes in the outer appearance have to be discussed.
An Advise for men at this point here, please avoid sentences like that to your Lady: “For that you paid so much?” And be prepared that she will never tell you how much it really has cost for this creation. Just tell her, no matter what: “You look amazing.” So she is happy and you have your peace. Anyway you can’t change anything anymore, so why making more trouble.